Before taking the oath the brother-in-law said to (Sh) that look I can forgive you with my true heart but you should not forswear. When my sister forswore, there were tears in the eyes of my brother-in-law. Then after some time my sister died, my brother-in-law is also dead.

Readers! A horrible story is my biography. This was a secret of my heart. But by looking at the end of this story I thought that I should convey it to every woman of the world. Perhaps someone shall be rectified, and he may be saved from a bad end. I am writing this article very carefully. I am also hiding certain aspects as well. But you will definitely understand my purpose.

This is an account of 1990 when I was in Matric. At that time we used to live in a small city. My elder sister (Sh) had been married for one year. My brother-in-law was an ordinary government servant. After the work hours he used to work in a private institution for a few hours. And he would return home late at night. After matric I got admission in college and (Sh) kept me at her home, because the college was near her house. Secondly after the departure of brother-in-law from home, my sister used to be alone for the whole day. My sister had a one year old son, whom I used to love a lot. One day after the departure of brother-in-law a relative of ours came to our house. (Sh) had him sit in her room and asked me to take the small kid to my room, as she had to have a communication with (M). I thought that he is an extremely poor relative who may have come to ask for money. I held the little boy and went to my room happily. Almost after half an hour he went away. (Sh) came to me and said to me that I should not tell my brother-in-law that (M) came. Your brother-in-law has an enmity with our poor relatives. I became quiet. She took a shower and offered Zuhr prayers and started cooking food. (Sh) was punctual about prayers and fasting right from the day one and used to offer tahajjud. After a few days (M) came again. I was again ordered to go to my room that the small boy was sleeping. But I don’t know why I got curious. Then I could not stop. I came out. The room of (Sh) was closed. My doubt transformed into a firm belief. I peeked inside the whole and I was dumbfounded. I came back and lied down in my room. I kept on crying for a long time that what happened to my sister. I tried a lot but I could not tell anything to my brother-in-law that after all this will ruin the house of my sister. Then this happened many times. (M) Would come to the house and I would be ordered to go to my room. After all I was a woman too. I could not tolerate this. One day my brother-in-law was at home. It was a holiday. (Sh) had gone out. I went to the room of my brother-in-law and tried to arouse him for bad things. Upon listening to me he said, “Look you are like my sisters. I cannot think like that about anyone except my wife. I was emotional. I said who you consider as a very pious wife… And then what I had seen and I had seen again and again, I told about that to my brother-in-law. At last I again provoked that great man for the sin. But he was satisfied. He would try to make me understand that it was wrong. In the meanwhile my sister came in the room. As soon as she came, I went out of the room. She had a suspicion and came after me to my room. She asked me and I denied. But after that day my sister started quarreling with me and my brother-in-law every day. She would cast all sorts of aspersions on us. But my brother-in-law never misbehaved with her. The fight reached its apex. (Sh) said to me that you take an oath from your brother-in-law on Quran-e-Pak that both of you are clean then I shall stop quarreling. At the end our mother, father and brother also came. My father said to my brother-in-law, “Son if you are not guilty, then give an oath. But please understand that this is not an easy thing. This is very heavy. Take oath according to the gravity of the situation. I give you another chance that you consult with my younger daughter once again. Both of you go to the lawn. And talk to each other. If you will accept the sin, then I shall guarantee, that both of you shall be forgiven. And the matter shall remain in the house.” I and my brother-in-law came to the lawn. He said to me, “I am not guilty. Now you tell what should we do?” I said to the brother-in-law, “My life shall be ruined. My family shall kill me with aspersions.” I said, “We did not commit this sin. You are true. You should give an oath that you have not committed this sin. And that if I ever did something wrong to this woman, then I be destroyed.” By giving oath like this, my own life shall be saved from ruining. And your oath shall be truthful as well.” I said to him, “You should take the name of (M) in this gathering; I am an eyewitness to this.” My brother-inlaw said, “You keep this woman’s secrets and Allah shall keep our secrets.” Then my broth-in-law gave an oath. My parents brought me home. I came under the spell of Satan and started walking the wrong path and then I got married. In the meanwhile my sister’s (Sh) died and she had given birth to three daughters. But she would still take the name of her pious and sincere husband and try to humiliate me. At last one day my broth-in-law lost his temper. He talked about the affair involving (M). Then a new storm erupted. A dispute happened for many months. Then one day it was settled that (Sh) would give an oath over the Quran. But I knew that she was lying. I and my family members were called. I tried to explain it to (Sh) in isolation. She said to me to keep quiet and that she had worshiped so much that I could not even think, and that Allah will forgive her. At last (Sh) put her hand on the Quran and forswore and said that if a non-mahram even ever touched me then even after dying may I not get peace. My bro-in-law stopped the quarrel. Before taking the oath the brother-in-law said to (Sh) that look I can forgive you with my true heart but you should not forswear. When my sister forswore, there were tears in the eyes of my brother-in-law. Then after some time my sister died, my brother-in-law is also dead. Three months after her death (Sh) met me in a dream while crying and she said, “Sister! I have dodged my husband. If I had sought forgiveness from that great man, then I would not have gotten this punishment. Now I am being punished. I have been told that you put your hand on Quran-e-Pak and you forswore, so you are an apostate, your worship, practice, charity, alms dues that you paid, nothing shall be accepted.”

Now every Thursday I see (Sh) suffering from a torment. Upon looking at her being punished I thought about myself that before the marriage I even chose to go on wrong paths. I cheated my husband. I did not forswear, but I shall be punished. I spent many days in this perplexity that how should I tell my husband. How should I seek forgiveness? How much ashamed would he be. I would recite Quran-e-Pak. I would cry. I would seek forgiveness from Allah. One day upon reading Quran I thought that when (Sh) did not get forgiveness then what would I do? I decided that today I shall tell my husband about everything. In the evening I sat down with my kids and told my husband about all the sins of my life. And I said that I am a wrongdoer. Whatever punishment you shall give me I shall take it. My husband listened to me and kept on thinking for a long time. He stood up and went out. He consulted with a mufti and he said, “Now there is no use of divorcing her. It is better to forgive her. My husband...” (Remaining on page 33)