Respected Hazrat Hakeem sahib my age is 24 years. Due to lack of homely Islamic environment I got indulge in bad deeds. In our family there is no restriction on meeting with male cousins. We used to sit together in solitude and chat and be mischievous for hours. There was no restriction upon us. Our elders had blind trust upon us. I would like to write here that our elders never thought that their children are growing up and there should be some restrictions regarding with whom they should spend time along. I had great friendship with all my cousins. All day we spent time in fun activities. We used to chat together eat along and play throughout the day. It was a joint family and home environment was very nice. Meaning no one had quarrelling with each other. All of us female cousins had confidence on ourselves and everyone was together. We had complete trust that our cousins are not like this. They are just our friends. I don’t know when I got so much near to my cousin that a sin was committed. And it happened at such a time that we did not have the feeling that this is a sin. As we matured I realized that I had lost everything.
One or two years were spent in repent and shame. However since the homely environment was not Islamic and there was no guidance. None of elders used to say prayers nor we thought of it. Hence the natural feeling of shame that I had was finished.
Then came such days that there was no sense of sin and my life got stuck in sand trap of sins. My mother's blind trust on me destroyed me. I wish my mother had kept a watchful eye on me. If only she would have taught me the difference between right and wrong. I was growing up she should have stopped me from spending time alone with my cousins. However this did not happen and I kept on doing sins.
But one day my female friend unintentionally put Ubqari Magazine in my bad and said that I have read it you should read it too as it is a good thing.
When I came back home and read it then it affected my heart that wazaif are a very good thing and it affects our work. I did not know that. When I read the part of spirituality and peace then my eye became watery. At the end when I read the intro of Ubqari Books then I called Ubqari Office. When I read the first book of compilation of previous Ubqari magazine then feeling of shame and sin awoke me.
From that day onwards all day my mind is stuck in this feeling that only if our homely environment would have been Islamic, if there would have been regularity imposed on prayers .
Only if we would have been allowed even salaam with our cousins then I would have spent a pious life, I would have been saying all prayers. I would have been saying prayers. Only if I was the way, God wanted me to be.. Then I realized I am very sinful. My mind was stuck. I could not remember anything. I felt like committing suicide. My folks wanted me to get married regarding which previously I was happy but now I am sad. My days and nights and heart are all dark due to sins. But ever since I got Ubqari I got a feeling that my repent would be accepted and my God will be happy from me. I heard in your seminar that the repent done in youth is always accepted so I have 100 % hope that my repent will be accepted. I have started to cover myself with Duppatta. I have stopped doing hello with all my cousins. I say five times pray.
I cry whole day and ask for forgiveness from God. I try to recite whole day I try to minimize my talk with anyone and spend most time in repent. I try to stay in ablution all day long. Please pray to God that I might find my Allah Almighty way our PROPHET ﷺ has told us to spend the day I should get a chance to spend the life in same way. I should be able to spend the life according to sharia and make my God happy. I don’t know why but I want repent for my cousin also reason being the way I was unfamiliar from religion so is he. By the grace of Allah I have no contact with him but I pray for him that he might get a chance to be pious. I request the mothers who read Ubqari that do not have blind trust on your girls. The restrictions that have been imposed by Islam they should be followed. So that may be due to your blind trust some poor girl is not in misery the way i am. I also request my sisters who have complete confidence and think of themselves as very strong that for God's sake people from whom Islam forsaken to meat they should follow that. I read somewhere that where there are two unknowingly people, over there third person is satin. When satin plays his game then a person realizes after a long time that what has happened to him This has already happened to me and I have lost everything but from the reference of Ubqari I request my sisters and daughters that for God’s sake save yourself so that may be blind trust may not drown due to blind trust on daughters.
While on your way, take small gimmicks of cardamom
Respected Hazrat Hakeem sahib Asslam o Alaikum! For readers of Ubqari I present small gimmicks of cardamom in writing.
Small cardamom and patients of epilepsy
Small green cardamom should be grinded and should be made to smell to patient of epilepsy this helps the patient’s situation.
Headache if there is severe pain in head them taking a smell of cardamom makes you sneeze which helps headache.
Power to stomach and heart small cardamom helps mind and heart. Its juice helps give relaxation to heart. If cardamom is cooked with Fennel speed then stomach gets healed. It stops vomiting and feeling of throwing up.
The beads of cardamom should be grilled with coconut also grilled and almonds and see of Coriander. After supper half spoon of this powder and one small cardamom is best for appetite and helps digest food
Mouth is freshened. If you keep one cardamom in your mouth and go out then throughout the day you won’t feel heat. Our father used this gimmick from saving himself from heat. If someone has smell in his sweat then he should keep one cardamom in mouth then there will be no smell in sweat. Those women who have low blood pressure they should drink juice of cardamom. The oil is very good from heart patients this helps prevent clotting. (Shammim Afshan Wasti)
Initiation and consequence of sin: Initiation of sin is as weak as spider’s web, but its consequences are as strong as ship’s anchor. (Abu Bakar bin Dawood رحمہ اللہ علیہ )
